If you find yourself in a relationship where time is scarce and companionship is hard to come by, here are five steps to take to lift the loneliness and begin to feel valued again.
1. Communicate your feelings
This is one thing that can’t be emphasized enough. Every relationship issue that has dragged on till it becomes unbearable has to be discussed with your partner first before anybody.
If you are not cool with the amount of time you are being afforded by your partner, don’t bottle it in for too long. Let them know that you need their attention.
2. Suggest date schedules
If you’re pressed for time in your relationship, you’ll have to deliberately make it happen. If it means scheduling one hour together every week on week days and then some more over the weekends, then so be it.
Making time for one another doesn’t have to be only face to face. If your partner is naturally so busy that time for you needs to be ground out, then you might have to help them find that time.
Here’s the thing, some people are just so invested in their work that they do not know when to stop and take a break. If he or she is that kind of person and you’re patient enough, creating a schedule of video calls, phone-calls and text messaging and encouraging him to create the little time to stay connected is not a bad idea.
This way, if things do not work due to an absolute lack of attention to you, you can say you genuinely tried to do what you can.
ALSO READ: What to do if communication is poor in your relationship
3. Make the best of the time you spend together
The time you’ve got to share with your man or woman, make it count. In a relationship where it is a rare commodity, all the time you get to spend with your partner should be milked, enjoyed and treasured to the max.
4. Are they truly hardworking?
If he or she is being really hardworking and has a tasking job, then those late nights and extra weekend hours should not really offend you so much.
While you deserve time, in the grander picture, you [and the kids you choose to have] also deserve a good future as well as a partner who is capable of playing their part in that.
Don’t harangue your boo too much when some of that free time you have should be spent on actually getting busy yourself.
5. Be considerate
One other important thing to note here is to be considerate and not overly selfish in your demand for time, or in the amount of time you spend with your partner.
If you are the busy one, you need to realise that no business can take the place of your partner and you should be fair enough to never neglect them, no matter how busy you get.
If you are the one who needs your partner to spend some more time with you, you also have to be fair on them, especially when you must have known their schedule and busy lifestyle before deciding to get into the relationship.
Don’t get into it and start nagging. That’d be unfair since you knew exactly what you were getting into.
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